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Roma 16 Marzo 2008 : Correre e marciare... Un vero PADRE non pu mancare ! -- Rome 16 March 2008 : Running and marching... A real DAD cannot miss this ! -- Rome 16 Mars 2008 : Courir et marcher... Un vrai PAPA ne peut pas rater cela ! -- Rom 16. Mrz 2008: zu laufen und zu gehen... Ein wahrer VATER kann das nicht verpassen! -- Roma 16 de marzo de 2008: correr e ir... Un verdadero PADRE no puede faltar eso -- Roma 16 de Maro de 2008: correr e andar... Um verdadeiro PAI no pode errar aquilo!
 
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AUSTRALIA
30/06/2008
Dads on the Air
OPEN LETTER TO AUSTRALIAN PRIME MINISTER, KEVIN RUDD
Peter van de Voorde 2008

Dear Prime Minister,
I would be delighted if you would please consider the following carefully, in the interest of the many thousands of dispossessed parents and children of Australia.
Sooner or later the tide is going to turn. It took many years for us to recognize the injustices perpetrated against our Indigenous populations, Slavery, Apartheid, Civil Rights etc, etc.

These injustices were ignored for many decades due to community ignorance. Unfortunately we are repeating the same injustices under another name on our own people, due to the same ignorance.
Saying SORRY to one deserving dispossessed group, while at the same time completely ignoring the dispossession taking place right under our noses, smacks of hypocrisy and ignorance.
I fully applaud your part in bringing about a long overdue apology to the stolen generation and the Indigenous population. The fact that it took 200 years for us to realize the damage we inflicted on this vulnerable group and denied them their fundamental human rights for so long, is an indictment of our level of compassion and empathy. Unfortunately during the 200 years of community ignorance, the voices of reason were ridiculed and brushed aside.
I plead with you to please take a look at what is happening today with compassion and empathy.
It is estimated that the stolen generation numbered approximately 50,000 children. We now know the horrendous ramification of this "Best Interest of the Children" policy debacle, ironically administered by someone with the offensive sickening title of "PROTECTOR OF ABORIGINES"
Sadly the figure of 50,000 children representing the Stolen Generation, pales into insignificance when compared with the current figures of forcible separation of children from their parents.

The latest ABS figures show that:
1. There are now almost 700,000 Australian children who no longer have any meaningful contact with their biological non custodial parents.
2. There are now 312,000 biological non custodial parents who no longer have any meaningful contact with their children.
These figures do not include the extended biological family members such as grandparents, uncles, aunties, cousins, etc, who are estimated to add a further 1.5 million people, who are also denied their ties of kinship with their much loved members of their families.
This is an estimated total of 2.6 million of the nations citizens now reduced to a "GENERATION OF THE DAMNED". This human horror, is administered by the current so called protector of the Best Interest of the Children, THE FAMILY COURT OF AUSTRALIA.
Contrary to what is promoted by those who wish to continue with the current failed policies, no scientific evidence has ever been produced anywhere, to show that large numbers of non custodial parents are voluntarily abandoning their children. While individual examples can always be found of any reprehensible behaviour, these should never be allowed to be promoted as representing the behaviour of the majority group.
The voices of reason, who are endeavoring to bring these gross violations of human rights to the attention of the community, are again ridiculed and brushed aside.
It comes as no surprise that so many children are neglected and abused in our community. It occurs because checks and balances have been removed by allowing the forced removal of hundreds of thousands of loving parents from their children.
Perhaps you could explain to an anxious community, how responsible parents are supposed to meet their duty of care and responsibility obligations to their children, when the State is permitting the illegal removal of children from their non custodial parents with impunity ???
I respectfully ask that you please consider the above together with my previous correspondence, and in the interest of all the disenfranchised members of 'THE GENERATION OF THE DAMNED' of this great country, hope that you are able to help bring about some relief to all those affected.
Our failure to act will undoubtedly produce a similar outcome for our community, as was the fate of the Indigenous community before us.
I very much look forward to a reply of my concerns.

Kind Regards

Peter van de Voorde
Presenter and Researcher
DADS ON THE AIR, AUSTRALIA
www.dadsontheair.net

UNITED STATES

13/06/2008


PappaRättsGruppen
Sweden


"A Father's Rights"
For more information about the movie, please see producer William Fain's web site


film trailer click here

GERMANY
12/06/2008
Väteraufbruch für Kinder

14 June 2008
Demo in Berlin
Children's right for loving both parents

10 Jahre nach der Kindschaftsrechtsreform ist Deutschland wieder das familienpolitische Schlusslicht in Europa: Finnische Trennungsmediation, polnisches Sorgerecht, dänisches Elterngeld, französisches Familiensplitting, österreichische Männerpolitik, belgisches Wechselmodell ... Familienpolitik kann sehr modern sein - und unsere Nachbarn machen uns vor, wie das geht.



promoted by Väteraufbruch für Kinder
with partecipation of Elterndemo.de - Väterradio
Pas-Eltern - Väter helfen Vätern - Familieninfotreff
Väter Aktuell - rennungsVäter e.V.

UNITED KINGDOM
10/06/2008
Fathers 4 Justice

10 June 2008
TWO members of Fathers 4 Justice launched a protest on the roof of Labour deputy leader Harriet Harman’s home on Sunday.


Read more on The Sun

BELGIUM

7/06/2008





Centre des Droits Parentaux - Justice Parentale





Collectif La Vie de Pères



J'aime Papa et Maman

Fête des Pères - 8 juin 2008
BRUXELLES PLACE DE LA MONNAIE
de 14 à 15h30

«PERES EN VOIE D'EXTINCTION»
pour attirer l'attention de l'opinion publique
sur sur le problème
de renouvellement des générations

«En Belgique de 200.000 à 400.000 enfants sont privés de vivre avec leur père ou mère. Quand... cela va-t-il cesser ? »

Communiqué de Presse - Action Fête des Pères 2008
Cette année, peu de pères furent présents à la fête. Vous vous demandez pourquoi ? Les raisons sont très simples !
Tout d’abord, la justice de Liège vient de convoquer, en référé, Adrien et Robin (et leur Papa) -- en pleine période de blocage scolaire -- pour qu’ils ferment leurs Blog --- et leur site --- alors qu’ils disent qu’ils aiment leurs papa et maman… mais… qu’ils sont privés de vivre avec leur maman et leurs frère et sœur !!!...
Oui, quand on connaît leur histoire (depuis plus de 9 ans) on constate que le système judiciaire maltraite vigoureusement des familles sur le plan psychologique ! Cette forme de maltraitance, de mère la justice, détruit plus encore un enfant que la traditionnelle claque aux fesses !
Adrien se rend très bien compte qu’il n’a plus rien à perdre et qu’il n’a pas peur de clamer ces formes d’injustices et de violences inhumaines. Il est lui-même insoumis à l’aliénation parentale, ainsi que son frère Robin (13 ans) et ses jeunes collaborateurs et collaboratrices de J’Aime Papa et Maman.
Ensuite, il y a des pères (et aussi des mères) qui doivent « marcher sur des œufs »… car ils sont tous aux prises avec la « justice » qui les privent aussi des liens familiaux.
Ils ne voient donc plus du tout leurs enfants ou n’ont plus de réels contacts avec eux.
L’un d’entre eux… pour pouvoir obtenir un droit de visite de son enfant, d’un jour par mois, il fut obligé par le juge de supprimer son BLOG où il décrivait ses souffrances causées par des situations inhumaines et intolérables – dans un État de Droits – alors qu’il n’avait rien fait pour mériter une telle situation.
Personnellement, privé de vivre avec mes 5 enfants, depuis plus de 14 ans, et alors qu’ils m’aimaient tant au cours de leurs existences… après le divorce, ils m’ont craché à la figure (comme à Alain, Anne, Jean-Pierre et aux autres pères et mères…) avec la bénédiction de la justice. Cela, en raison de cette manipulation de leur mère, dont la forme la plus importante est l’« aliénation parentale », forme de syndrome comme le « syndrome de Stockholm » qui lui est plus connu, et reconnu.
Dernièrement, un papa * (privé lui aussi de vivre avec son enfant) s’est froissé avec moi car je lui ai fait remarquer qu’il était indécent d’utiliser un grand calicot, pour la fête des pères, avec ce slogan : « Noyez vos enfants avant qu’ils ne vous crachent à la figure… ». Il m’a traité de donneur de leçons et n’est pas venu à la fête des pères…
Si vous ne comprenez pas la raison pour laquelle des êtres humains refusent de procréer… alors, vous le comprendrez lorsque vous ou vos propres enfants connaîtront les mêmes souffrances et les mêmes horreurs d’existence lors du naufrage de leur couple. Je sais de quoi je parle, car j’ai connu trop de pères qui se sont suicidés parce qu’ils ne pouvaient plus vivre sans leurs enfants. Et d’autres pères, morts misérablement dans des squats, en hiver, ou dans leurs misérables chambrées… par overdose d’alcool… pour oublier leurs souffrances. Ceux-là ils y sont parvenus. Qui s’inquiète des souffrances de ces papas et de ces mamans privés de vivre avec leurs enfants ? Parce que la justice a posé son grand cul sur leurs droits de pères et de mères.
Ça n’arrive pas qu’aux autres !!!... Ça vous pend au nez !!!...
Vous risquez aussi que vos enfants vous crachent au nez avec la bénédiction de la justice… si vous-même ne réagissez pas !
Tant qu’il n’y aura pas des hommes et des femmes… des pères, des mères, des futurs pères, des futures mères, des grands parents, des futurs grands parents, des enfants,… brefs, d’un plus grand nombre de citoyens à réagir contre ces injustices, la situation s’aggravera encore plus… et des avocats s’enrichiront encore plus… avec la bénédiction de la justice ! Car c’est là la clé de la solution : ce n’est pas simple à comprendre et c’est difficile à prononcer…
Est-ce la raison pour laquelle cette CLÉ, forgée depuis 1994, n’ouvre-t-elle pas la « PORTE DE LA JUSTICE » afin de rendre une justice équitable et surtout mieux équilibrée ! Car la balance de la justice penche toujours aux avantages des femmes et très rarement aux hommes, lors des conflits conjugaux et famillaux.
Il faut que ça cesse !!!... Nous devons réagir si nous sommes humains.

Je lui dédie cet article *
Michel

UNITED STATES
06/06/2008
Glenn Sacks
Men's and fathers' issues
newspaper columnist,
radio commentator, and blogger

FATHERS DAY 2008 DEMONSTRATION - U.S. CAPITOL

Saturday June 14th - Sunday June 15th / Fathers Day 2008
US Capitol - west side overlooking The Mall.

OUR organizations, Fathers-4-Justice/Families-4-Justice have been diligently working to put together OUR rally. A rally where we as a nation, will gather to petition our government for reform. A rally where an injustice which is being perpetrated against OUR children can be addressed in a NATIONAL forum. We have decided that on Friday, the 13th of June, two days before Father's day we are going to gather at all 50 State Capitols/Statehouses UNITED. On this date from the hours of 12:00pm till 3:00pm UNITED we will DEMAND a change to the manner in which our nations family courts are currently conducting business.
This is OUR time, This is OUR opportunity, We are UNITED! The following organizations have UNITED with us to support in our efforts: American Coalition for Fathers & Children (ACFC), United Civil Rights Councils of America (UCRCoA) and Children Need Both Parents(CNBP).

JOIN US! In OUR efforts to affect change! I have attached our NATIONAL FATHERLESS DAY RALLY flyer. Please send this announcement far and wide. Post it on your websites, your MySpace pages, your blogs, send it to all of your groups but most importantly send it to our employees, the legislators that have turned a deaf ear to our plea's for a change, we are now UNITED and DEMANDING A CHANGE!

more informations on F4J-USA web site

UNITED STATES
05/06/2008
Blog Parental Kidnapping - Mona Lena

NANCM | The National Association of Non Custodial Moms, Inc.

The National Association of Non Custodial Moms, Inc. is recognized as a 501(c)(3) Non Profit by the Internal Revenue Service.
NANCM is an association which believes that children have a right to BOTH fit and loving parents as EQUALLY as possible in their life.
When both parents are fit and loving, 50/50 joint custody (as close as possible) should be the standard arrangement, with "move aways" being illegal.
A court of law may make a move away legal, but it certainly doesn't make it right.
NANCM, Inc. provides emotional support to all non-custodial parents, including:
- Long distance moms
- Mothers who are victims of a "move away"
- Mothers who have lost custody for any reason
- Mothers who are victims of court travesties & injustice
- Mothers who willingly relinquished custody of their children for the children's best interest.
- Any parent who does not have full custody of their children and needs emotional support dealing with the aspects of being a non-custodial parent.*

According to the most recent census bureau statistics, 2.2 million women lack custody of their children in the U.S. An even greater number of fathers are non-custodial. What is more staggering is a large percentage of these parents are needlessly "shut out" of their children's lives. They are denied visitation ordered by the courts repeatedly, with no recourse. They are denied phone calls and letters as well. The custodial parent does not keep the other parent informed of changes and activities in the children's lives. These parents are serving a severely minimized or non-existent roll in their children’s lives, but not by choice. Some custodial parents move their children out of state, and the non-custodial parent is hindered or completely blocked from the ability to nurture their relationship with their children.

Read more on Mona Lena's blog

UNITED STATES
04/06/2008
Glenn Sacks
Men's and fathers' issues
newspaper columnist,
radio commentator, and blogger
A Divorced Dad Song from the 1950s
"The last time I saw Marie she was waving me goodbye / With hurry home drops on her cheek that trickled from her eye / Marie is only six years old, information please / Try to put me through to her in Memphis, Tennessee"

I'd been hearing the song "Memphis, Tennessee" by Elvis Presley, Chuck Berry and others for decades without ever realizing what Berry, the song's author, was talking about. It's actually a divorced dad song about a father's severed relationship with his 6-year-old girl, Marie. Ned Holstein of Fathers & Families pointed it out to me the other day, and I felt stupid for not having realized it before.
The lyrics to the song are below, along with a video of Chuck Berry performing it.

If you prefer Elvis, you can hear that by clicking
here.

We'll add it to our list of divorced dad songs which includes: Craig Morgan's Every Friday Afternoon, Trace Adkins' I'm Tryin', Doug Supernaw's I Don't Call Him Daddy, Toby Keith's Who's That Man?, Tim McGraw's Do You Want Fries With That?, and Sting's I'm So Happy I Can't Stop Crying, which was also later recorded by Toby Keith.

Memphis, Tennessee
(Words & Music by Chuck Berry)

Long distance information give me Memphis, Tennessee
Help me find the party trying to get in touch with me
She could not leave her number but I know who placed the call
My uncle took the message and he wrote it on the wall

Help me information to get in touch with my Marie
She's the only one who'd phone me here from Memphis, Tennessee
Her home is on the Southside, high upon a ridge
Just a half a mile from the Mississippi bridge

Help me information more than that I cannot add
Only that I miss her and all the fun we had
But we were pulled apart because her mom did not agree
Tore apart our happy home in Memphis, Tennessee

The last time I saw Marie she was waving me goodbye
With hurry home drops on her cheek that trickled from her eye
Marie is only six years old, information please
Try to put me through to her in Memphis, Tennessee

All the news from Glenn Sacks Newsletter

AUSTRALIA
04/06/2008
Dads on the Air
MORE FALSE HOPE, FOR PARENTS KEPT FROM THEIR CHILDREN
Peter van de Voorde

In Australia, the Family Law Council, which is the Federal Government’s advisory body on family law matters, has called for the establishment of a Child Orders Enforcement Agency, along similar lines to the Child Support Agency.
Aggrieved non custodial parents who have been denied court-ordered access to their children, since the inception of a Draconian Family Law Industry, some 35 years ago and who have been calling for such measures to be taken for more than three decades, do not hold their breath. They have long ago lost faith in a system in which the scales of justice are tilted firmly in favour of custodial parents. Any suggested changes to what has been shown to be such a gross travesty of justice for so long, is viewed with great skepticism.
Alarm bells ring immediately when it is noted the council’s report, “Improving Post Parenting Order Processes”, was prepared by a committee of eminent judges, magistrates and legal academics who wrote the report under Patrick Parkinson, professor of law at the University of Sydney, whose term as council chairman has expired.
Hundreds of thousands of the nation’s victims of the Family Law Industry, both parents and children, have witnessed at first hand how the odds are stacked against them from the moment a parent becomes a Non Custodial Parent.
Where have the above judges, magistrates and legal academics been for the past 35 years? Why has there been such a deafening silence all these years from the above committee members? Were they not aware of what was going on or were they too busy plundering the family wealth from separating families? Did the eminent members of the bench not hear the cries of anguish from the non custodial parents and their children all these years, while they turned a blind eye to the forcible removal of children from non custodial parents by vindictive, and in many cases disordered and dysfunctional Custodial parents. Why for the past 35 years, have members of the bench refused to use the punitive measures at their disposal, in order to ensure that non custodial parents and their children remain connected following parental separation. Their failure to do so is a crime against humanity and an abuse of the rights of our Nation’s children.
For the past 35 years we have witnessed the mockery of a Family Justice System pretending to uphold the principle of equality and impartiality in what can only be described as a mal- administration of Family Law matters. Millions of the nation’s parents and children, who have had the misfortune to become victims of this Industry, have for the past 35 years protested against the way the scales of justice in Family Law are tipped heavily one way, in order to help maintain the frenzy of the Law profession and their mercenaries, in the pursuit of plundering the family wealth from unsuspecting separating parents.
The Laws governing Family law matters were drafted by Lawyers, with the main beneficiaries being the law profession and associated mercenaries, who have now joined in a growing melee to capture a share of these ill-gotten spoils. The law profession’s success depends on how much conflict and animosity is present or can be created, for them to mount an economically successful case. The sole custodial parent model following separation has provided them with a guaranteed high level of ongoing conflict, and by definition it has provided them with a lucrative economic outcome.
Family Laws which were drafted in the early seventies were supposedly designed to help solve the problems associated with the highly emotive issues of parental separation, especially the issue of child custody and the right and need, to ensure ongoing contact of non custodial parents with their children, unless it was unsafe for them to do so.
However whether by accident or by intent THE RELEVANT SOLE PARENT CUSTODY MODEL WAS ADOPTED, SO AS TO GUARANTEE FAILURE, with the resulting horrendous ramifications for all those who incorrectly believed that justice would prevail, and that by using the family justice system, at least enduring contact with their children would be ensured.
This effectively means that any Court Orders you may have obtained, mostly at great expense, have a totally different meaning depending on whether you have been made a custodial parent or a non custodial or contact parent. So there are two totally different outcomes for one set of Court Orders.
1. From the moment you are made a custodial parent, you have effectively been given absolute power and control over every aspect of your children’s life, can ignore the Court Orders with impunity, and can eliminate the other parent and extended family members out of the children’s life with ease. The methods used have been well documented for decades.
2. From the moment you are made a non custodial or contact parent you no longer have any say in any aspects of what happens in your children’s life. You are no longer able to protect them, love, support and care for them and you can be totally eliminated from your children’s life with frightening speed and ease. To add insult to injury, you can then be accused of abandoning your children and subsequently labeled a deadbeat parent.
The adverse impact of such injustices are further highlighted by the fact that if a non-custodial parent contravenes articles of the Court Order, such as not returning the children on time from a contact visit, the CUSTODIAL PARENT simply picks up the phone, calls the police and the offending parent is immediately labeled a kidnapper, hostage taker or child abductor, and set upon by various federal and local police agencies. The only cost incurred to the Custodial Parent is the cost of the phone call.
By sharp contrast if the CUSTODIAL parent decides to ignore and contravene the same set of Court Orders, and refuse to let a child have anything further to do with their non custodial parent even if they live in the same street, the non custodial parent’s only recourse is to take the matter back to the very Court which failed them so miserably in the first place. No simple phone call for them, but rather further expensive legal proceedings which ultimately lead to nothing, if a recalcitrant Custodial parent decides to ignore the directions of the Court. In their twisted logic the Industry reasons that to upset the Custodial parent would be detrimental to the “Best Interest of the Child”.
This is what the Family Justice Industry sees as an equitable outcome.
Following 35 years of silence, these eminent members of the Family Law Council committee, have now recommended that a “small, independent (enforcement) agency with offices in each capital city” would be the best way to respond to serious breaches of contact orders. They have suddenly decided that serious and willful disregard of parenting orders was a matter of public interest and that a child’s best interest was at stake when a parent breached an order that a court had deemed beneficial to the child.. They also belatedly consider that such breaches brought the Family Court into disrepute.
With their collective tongues firmly planted in their cheeks, they suggest these enforcement agencies would encourage parents to resolve disputes without litigation. But then true to form and making sure to protect the lucrative status quo of their Industry and in order to maintain the standard of living of their fellow members of the Law fraternity, they recommend litigation should be instituted against the offending parent in the Family Court with the aggrieved parent able to instruct a Lawyer provided by the agency.
The committee acknowledges their recommendations would be an expensive exercise, and therefore propose that extra funding be made available to legal aid commissions in order to help parents fund enforcement matters before the Family Courts.
To all those who have been a victim of this badly flawed system, it would appear to be nothing more than an attempt to create a growth in public funded ineffectual pursuits of enforcement of contravention orders in the Family Court. Perhaps there is a downturn in the numbers of aggrieved parents seeking justice from this farcical institution.
You don’t have to be a brain surgeon to recognize that a court which refuses to punish habitual offenders for contravention of their own orders, is going to do anything different just because the aggrieved parents are represented by legal aid Lawyers.
The eminent members of the Family Law Council Committee suggest that such legal actions in the Family Court as they recommend would ensure compliance. With all due respect eminent members, could you please explain how you see your recommendations ensuring compliance?????
This is all smoke and mirrors gobbledygook, designed to make it look as if they are a caring Court with “The Best Interest of the Children” at heart. However all the available evidence would suggest otherwise.
If this committee was even remotely serious at trying to resolve the ongoing flagrant contraventions of Court ordered Contact Orders, it would have been better to consider the proposal by Family Law campaigner Simon Hunt, of a “CONTACT RECOVERY ORDER” or (CRO)
Unfortunately all the available evidence shows that when practical commonsense suggestions are made to resolve this travesty of justice against non custodial parents and their children, it is either ignored or ridiculed by all those engaged in maintaining the status quo for their own self interests.
The following is an explanation of the CROs by Mr Hunt. I believe this would also be a practical and effective low cost mechanism to enforce Court Ordered Contact Orders

The Recovery of Contact Order (RCO) mechanism is a simple way of protecting children facing the separation of their parents and will prevent most custody cases from even starting (because there is no aggrieved party to initiate litigation).

Immediately enforceable Recovery of Contact Order (RCO)

POLICY
Protecting children from having of their parents removed by the other upon separation.

THE MECHANISM
That any parent denied equal parenting time of their child or children can apply for immediate relief by way of a Recovery of Contact Order (RCO) protecting the child's relationship with both its parents. The excluded parent would obtain the RCO from the police or the magistrate or district court clerks office. Like an AVO or Intervention Order the Recovery of Contact Order (RCO) would be effective immediately and immediately enforceable by the police. It would provide the applicant up to a maximum of seven days of contact with their child per fortnight (or less by agreement).

Like an AVO or Intervention Order the application would go to court within days so that the respondent party, the parent withholding the child or children, has the opportunity to oppose the order.

If he RCO is not opposed it stays in force.

If the RCO is opposed, the arguments and evidence of the respondent parent will be assessed by the court and a decision made to either;

i) dismiss the respondent's case,

ii) refer the matter to the Family Court or Federal Magistrates Court whilst making an interim order for the contact requested by the Applicant Parent up to 50% ie: 7 days a fortnight (or less as agreed), or partial or complete exclusion of the applicant parent. The court may also order that allegations of child abuse or neglect are investigated by an appropriates child protection agency.

Prior to hearing the RCO would be effective immediately and immediately enforceable by the police unless the withholding parent lays criminal charges of abuse or serious neglect with the police, in which case the matter would be heard by the Magistrate or District Court before restoration of contact (50% or less by agreement) can be enforced.

VERY YOUNG CHILDREN
RCOs would not be effective immediately or immediately enforceable when the child is less that one years old or is being breast fed but would none the less be promptly adjudicated by the Magistrates court.

FAMILY VIOLENCE Allegations of violence, be they genuine or contrived, would not be grounds to exclude one the child's parents when third party change over arrangements can be made.
SPAIN
02/06/2008
Plataforma por la
Custodia Compartida
Discriminado por ser hombre
La custodia compartida se abre paso como la mejor opción para los hijos de separados - Pero el 97% se concede a la madre - ¿Queríamos igualdad?

PERE RÍOS 27/05/2008
Hace décadas eran vistos como bichos raros, pero ahora son legión. Más de 110.000 menores ingresan cada año en el ya saturado club de hijos de divorciados. Niños que tendrán que habituarse, una de dos, a la ausencia de un progenitor, casi siempre el padre, o a vivir a caballo entre dos casas. Los expertos creen que suele ser mejor para ellos lo segundo, la custodia compartida, pero los jueces siguen decidiendo lo primero. El 97% de las separaciones acaban con los hijos bajo la custodia de la madre. Una inercia difícil de romper. ¿Está discriminado el varón en las separaciones? Muchos creen que sí.

¿Es la custodia compartida lo más beneficioso para los niños?
UNITED STATES
02/06/2008
BSI-International
The Most Memorable Moment With My Father Writing Contest

What do our children -- our bridge to the future -- cherish most? If given the opportunity, what would our children tell us about the person or persons that matter most in their lives? What memories will leave an indelible imprint on our children as they make the journey from childhood to adulthood? Children throughout the United States from Grades 1 through 5 received an opportunity to tell the world what they cherished most when they participated in an essay contest sponsored by Just Us Books (www.justusbooks.com) entitled, The Most Memorable Moment With My Father Writing Contest.
The inspiration for The Most Memorable Moment With My Father Writing Contest emanates from a children’s book published by Just Us Books – One Million Men And Me -- which is authored by Kelly Starling Lyons and illustrated by Peter Ambush. One Million Men And Me provides a view of the 1995 Million Man March through the eyes of a young girl who attended the event with her Father. When I learned about The Most Memorable Moment With My Father Writing Contest, I immediately contacted Ms. Katura Hudson at Just Us Books and expressed my interest in publishing the contest’s winning essays in a future issue of IN SEARCH OF FATHERHOOD®. Thanks to Ms. Hudson and her colleagues at Just Us Books, the essays of the winning contestants of The Most Memorable Moment With My Father Writing Contest – Jahbril Porter-Ollavria; Marquez Morrow; Denarius Woods; and Fatherlessness is a universal issue. It transcends the boundaries of geography, economics, culture, politics, language, religion, and ethnicity. A dominant male presence in the lives of our children as well as the lack of a dominant male presence has a dramatic influence on the decisions that children make once they reach adulthood. These decisions involve, among other things, career paths, parenting styles, and the selection of a spouse. Fatherlessness is an issue that is explored in a powerful and riveting documentary – Father Figure – which is co-written and co-produced by two rising stars in the Fatherhood Movement – Professor Eleanor Earl, an Assistant Professor of English and Cinema Studies at Hampton University and Odetta Tamu Wright, a playwright with 30 plays to her credit, poet, author and actress. You’ll find out how these multi-talented young women through their documentary – Father Figure -- have energized the Global Dialogue on Fatherhood in our Father Figure Movement section.

Once upon a time we were a village. The village raised its children. Fathers, Mothers, husbands, wives, grandparents, great grandparents, uncles, aunts, neighbors, schools and churches shared and utilized their key pieces of the puzzle to create and implement plans that moved families forward and worked as a team to positively shape the minds and souls of its children – its future – its bridge to the future. Neighbors helped neighbors. Grandparents and great grandparents were the Elders in the village. The Elders in the village were protected and respected. Children were the heart and soul of the village. There was an unspoken and unwritten understanding that each child in the village was everyone’s child and that everyone in the village was responsible for protecting, mentoring, and loving each child and that every home, school and church within the village would be a safe haven for the children – the bridge to the village’s future -- as they made their journey from childhood to adulthood. Much has changed. There are some who say that the village is fragmented, unnecessary, powerless and voiceless. Yet, vestiges of the village still exist. If you listen closely you can hear inspiring and instructive Voices From The Village.
[more]
CANADA
02/06/2008
Yvon Dallaire
"La réelle fonction du père"

Bonjour à tous et à toutes,
Le 15 juin (8 juin en Belgique) 2008 aura lieu la Fete annuelle des pères. A cette occasion, j'aimerais vous offrir le texte ci-joint et ci-dessus intitulé La réelle fonction du père. Vous avez l'autorisation de le publier et de le diffuser à votre guise à la condition d'en citer la référence.
Source et références

En cette journée de la fête des pères et dans un contexte social où de plus en plus de pères veulent s'impliquer dans l'éducation de leurs enfants, il serait peut-être bon de se poser la question : " En quoi consiste réellement la fonction paternelle ? " En quoi sa fonction est-elle complémentaire, et non similaire, à la fonction maternelle ? Quelle est la mission réelle du père ? Voici quelques éléments de réflexion que j'ai glanés au cours de mes lectures et de ma vie de père et qui m'ont servi à écrire le chapitre Un père, pour quoi faire ?

1
Il existe une différence fondamentale entre rôle sexuel et fonction sexuelle. En résumé, le rôle désigne des comportements, des actes ou des attitudes conscientes, volontaires, concrètes, interchangeables et relatifs comme les tâches ménagères ou de pourvoyeurs. Ces rôles évoluent au gré du temps et des modes et peuvent être indifféremment remplis par la mère ou le père (identité de genre). La fonction est à l'inverse des rôles car celle-ci est inconsciente, psychologique (non volontaire), unique, spécifique et absolue (identité sexuée). Aucune mère, malgré sa bonne volonté, ne peut remplir la fonction paternelle ; elle ne peut remplir que " sa " fonction maternelle. Et vice versa !

La fonction maternelle est d'abord une fonction de matrice, de source nourricière, d'enveloppe, de réceptacle de vie, de rétention. La mère représente l'abri, la sécurité, la protection, la chaleur, l'affection, la fusion, la compréhension La mère représente l'amour. La fonction du père en est une de séparation, d'expulsion du sein maternel, de distinction, de différenciation. Le père doit éduquer ses enfants dans le sens étymologique du mot " educare " : faire sortir, tirer dehors, conduire au-dehors avec soin.

La fonction du père est de séparer l'enfant de la mère. Il doit s'interposer entre la mère et l'enfant pour permettre à l'enfant de développer son identité en dehors de la symbiose maternelle et rappeler à la mère qu'elle est aussi une femme, une amante, un être de plaisir, non seulement un être de devoir généreux. Si la mère représente l'amour fusionnel, le père représente les limites, les frontières, la séparation psychologique.
L'enfant a besoin de sentir toute l'attention de la mère pour découvrir sa puissance. Mais il a aussi besoin des interdits de son père pour connaître ses limites et apprendre à faire attention aux autres. L'enfant apprend, par sa mère, qu'il est au centre de l'univers, de son univers ; il doit apprendre, par son père, qu'il existe d'autres univers avec lesquels il devra collaborer pour survivre et s'épanouir. L'enfant doit apprendre à se situer à mi-chemin entre l'attitude du chat et du chien. Le chat se croit le maître en voyant tout ce que son " esclave " fait pour lui, alors que le chien perçoit son propriétaire comme son maître parce qu'il est capable de tout faire pour lui.

D'après les psychologues, la fonction paternelle se manifeste dans cinq secteurs précis :
1. La protection. Auparavant, grâce à sa force physique, cette protection était surtout limitée aux dangers physiques extérieurs : l'homme des cavernes devait protéger les siens de prédateurs de toutes sortes. L'homme du XXIe siècle sera de plus en plus appelé à assurer, en plus, une sécurité émotive non seulement pour ses enfants, mais aussi pour sa femme (c'est d'ailleurs là l'une des principales demandes de la femme moderne). Sa femme et ses enfants veulent pouvoir compter sur lui. Pour ce faire, il doit évidemment être présent, physiquement et psychologiquement, et être valorisé dans cette fonction.
2. L'éducation. Le père doit faciliter à ses enfants l'apprentissage du contrôle de soi ; il doit leur apprendre à renoncer à la satisfaction immédiate de ses besoins et désirs ; il doit leur apprendre la patience. Il doit surtout les aider à canaliser leur agressivité vers une expression positive et constructive de celle-ci. Il est évident que, ce faisant, il apprend lui aussi à mieux gérer ses propres besoins et sa propre agressivité. Mais n'est-ce pas en enseignant qu'on apprend à enseigner ?
3. L'initiation. Le père a aussi comme fonction d'humaniser l'enfant à la frustration et au manque afin de pouvoir l'intégrer dans le monde adulte et le monde social, comme cela se faisait dans les rituels initiatiques des tribus dites " primitives ". Le père initie l'enfant aux règles de la société, sinon aucune vie sociale n'est possible. La démission du père à ce niveau est probablement en grande partie responsable de l'augmentation croissante de la délinquance juvénile. Les enfants deviennent délinquants parce qu'ils continuent de croire que tout leur est dû et que les autres sont à leur service (comme l'était maman).
4. La séparation. La femme moderne demande à l'homme du XXIe siècle de l'accompagner dans toutes les étapes de la grossesse, de l'accouchement et des soins de l'enfant et je crois que cet accompagnement constitue une excellente façon de développer le sens de la paternité. Mais, j'insiste pour réaffirmer que la fonction du père est de séparer l'enfant de la mère et la mère de l'enfant et non pas de former une " sainte trinité " où chacun perd son identité. Ainsi, le père permet la survie et l'épanouissement de l'enfant ; ainsi, l'homme permet la survie et l'épanouissement de la femme qui existe dans la mère.
5. La filiation. Peu importe le nom de famille donné à l'enfant, celui-ci a besoin de savoir qu'il a un père et qui est ce père. Il a aussi besoin de savoir qu'il s'inscrit dans une lignée qui possède une histoire. Il a besoin de se sentir relié à l'humanité, qu'il fait partie de la grande famille humaine. Traditionnellement, la filiation était patrilinéaire ; elle assurait au père qu'il avait un fils ou une fille et elle assurait à l'enfant, fille ou fils, qu'il avait bien un père, ce père.

La maternité ne fait pas de doute : la mère sait que c'est " son " enfant parce qu'elle l'a porté. La paternité, elle, doit parfois être prouvée et c'est la raison principale pour laquelle, ne l'oublions pas, la filiation patrilinéaire et la monogamie se sont développées. L'homme peut ainsi être assuré qu'il est vraiment le père de ses enfants et qu'il peut consacrer ses ressources, sa force de travail et son affection à leur survie et leur développement. C'est une attitude extrêmement paranoïde de croire que les hommes ont inventé ces institutions pour asservir les femmes. Ils l'ont fait pour protéger leurs droits, leur paternité, ce qui m'apparaît un mobile tout à fait légitime. Sinon, l'homme serait encore plus esclave de la femme en ce sens que sa fonction serait réduite à son rôle de pourvoyeur : améliorer les conditions de vie de n'importe quel enfant et il devrait probablement prendre en charge de nombreux enfants qui ne sont pas les siens.

2
Déjà, en juillet 1966, Margaret Mead proposait dans un article de Redbook le mariage en deux étapes. La première consistait en un lien légal sans véritable engagement et sans conséquences advenant un divorce : le mariage individuel ou amoureux. La deuxième étape légalisait la relation à long terme avec des garanties concernant les enfants en cas de divorce : le mariage parental. Ce mariage unirait les partenaires à vie. La première étape a donné naissance au foisonnement des unions libres des années 70 et 80. Mais la deuxième étape n'a jamais pris forme. Les enfants n'ont aucune garantie que leurs droits seront respectés dans le cas de divorce. Les mariages basés sur le sentimentalisme, le non-engagement et l'absence de sens pratique responsable deviennent évidemment explosifs et traumatisants pour toutes les parties en cause au moment du divorce, et les enfants sont souvent l'enjeu des disputes entre ex-amants.
Les alternatives du père
Devant la situation actuelle, l'homme devenu père se trouve face à une alternative que l'on peut présenter de différentes façons :
1. Il délègue toutes ses responsabilités à la mère et lui laisse tout le pouvoir ou bien il s'approprie la partie du pouvoir qui lui revient et fait partie intégrante du triangle familial.
2. Il reste le pourvoyeur de nourriture qu'il a été depuis le début de l'humanité ou bien il s'implique en plus au plan relationnel et émotif pour éviter d'être le père manquant à l'origine des enfants manqués (Guy Corneau) parce qu'ils ont eu trop de mère et pas assez de père.
3. Il démissionne et ne sert que d'épouvantail au service de la mère ou bien il se tient debout et se bat pour remplir sa fonction de père.

Comme l'a si bien fait ressortir le sociologue québécois Germain Dulac, 3 les études faites sur la paternité l'ont été autour des quatre paradigmes négatifs suivants : la passivité, l'absence, la violence et l'abus. On s'est plutôt penché sur les conséquences de l'absence ou de la passivité du père et sur les effets négatifs des abus paternels de pouvoir plutôt que chercher à étudier la paternité pour elle-même, ses caractéristiques intrinsèques, ses apports à l'éducation et l'évolution des enfants ou les façons de mieux l'exercer.

Il serait temps que le discours des pères ­ et partant celui des hommes ­ soit enfin entendu pour ce qu'il est : une réelle volonté de participer à l'éducation des enfants et à l'évolution de l'humanité.

Yvon Dallaire M. Ps.
Psychologue et auteur
http://www.yvondallaire.com

1 Extrait du livre Homme et fier de l'être. Un livre qui dénonce les préjugés contre les hommes et fait l'éloge de la masculinité, publié aux Éditions Option Santé (Canada) en 2001.
2 Certaines études rapportent que 2 à 3 % des enfants sont élevés par un père qui n'est pas le leur, à l'insu du père.
3 Dulac, Germain, La configuration du champ de la paternité : politiques, acteurs et enjeux, in Lien social et politique, no 37, printemps-été 1997.

UNITED KINGDOM
02/06/2008
Grandparents Apart
The 1st in Britain’s Mobile Family Information and Education Centre created by Grandparents Apart UK will be setting off on Monday 9th June 2008 on a tour of Scotland.

The (Investing in ideas section) of the Big Lottery has awarded the group a grant of £10,000.00p to develop the project further. The idea for the project came from Jimmy Deuchars the founder of the group in Glasgow.
Our groups were involved along with the Scottish Government in the creation of 'The Charter for Grandchildren' and 'The Parenting Agreement' which we will be promoting along with other family literature everywhere we go.
With balloons attached and blowing in the wind we will be leaving Sunny Govan Radio Station, 249 Govan Road Glasgow around 9.30am proceeding to George Square for 10.am where millions will be seeing us off.

Scottish Media crews will be welcomed to record and interview Jimmy and Margaret Deuchars along with dodgy their Star pet rabbit who is going along with them rather than upset him by putting him into care. You can view Dodgy’s rise to fame on http://fr.youtube.com/watch?v=ag5if22n0WE

Grandparents Apart UK is a Scottish Registered Charity staffed completely by volunteers and has another group in Kilmarnock. A group in Chorley and one in Plymouth have asked us to assist them in a similar set up and we have in the past helped other groups in setting up.

Jimmy Deuchars
Grandparents Apart Self Help Group Scotland
22 Alness crescent
Glasgow G52 1PJ

BELGIUM

30/05/2008



"Access Denied"
Pascal Gallez
Sabine Vander Elst

nell'ambito degli eventi promossi per il 25/04/2008

"access denied, accès interdit" - "accesso negato"

1a parte
2a parte

Thanks to Thilo Muehlberger for this video

http://1777.lapetition.be
Petition will close on 7 February 2009.

AUSTRALIA
30/05/2008
Lone Fathers

"THE NOOS" the Lone Fathers Association Australia official newsletter

I would ask you to take the time to read it as it contains many articles pertaining to the role of 'Fathers' in today's society.

The Lone Fathers Association has no bias towards any faith, non faith, gender or position in society.

Our primary concerns are for the welfare and rights of the children caught up in the breakdown of 'the family unit' and how as fathers we can assist, fathers, mothers, grandparents but most importantly our children to maintain a meaningful relationship with all members of their family.

Family Law and Child Support are issues that can tear apart that relationship.
The LFAA has for many years fought for fair and equitable agreement through consulting with government departments, The Family Law Court and the CSA.
Some of these initiatives have been taken on board and adopted.

As fathers that have gone through the damage this has had on our children and as their 'dads' we are asking you to have an open mind and consider the ongoing effect it has on our future society. Our children, and their children should not have to go through what we have had to endure.

Regards
Mathew L. Richards
LFAA Newsletter Editor.


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