GeCoBi Newsletter Août 2008

Le premier numéro
Voici le premier numéro des Newsletters de GeCoBi. Nous souhaitons dorénavant vous informer par ce moyen des événements et des développements de GeCoBi, et, bien entendu, de tout ce qui concerne l’introduction de la coresponsabilité parentale. Nous aimerions cependant nous arrêter également sur d’autres thèmes concernant la parentalité et vous faire part de nos réflexions. Nous vous souhaitons beaucoup de plaisir à la lecture de ce premier numéro des Newsletters de GeCoBi.

Les événements passés
L’Association suisse pour la coparentalité (GeCoBi) a été créée le 13 mai 2008 en tant qu’association faîtière nationale. Quinze organisations ont préparé durant trois ans cette création, avec une proposition de changement de loi en vue d’une coresponsabilité parentale. Cette proposition a été adressée et présentée à l’office fédéral de Justice en juin 2007. Avec la manifestation nationale pour la coparentalité du 17 mai 2008 sur la Place fédérale, GeCoBi a donné un premier signe fort de son existence. Sur notre page d’accueil, vous pourrez retrouver de nombreux témoignages, les discours qui ont été prononcés et les reflets qu’en a donné la presse nationale. La création d’une association faîtière d’organisations touchant à la parentalité et ce, au niveau national, a été saluée de toutes parts.

Et maintenant, le vif du sujet!
Durant les prochaines semaines, les prochains mois, ce sera une étape capitale pour faire accepter notre projet de loi pour une coresponsabilité parentale. Nous menons ce combat depuis des années pour que les deux parents jouissent des mêmes droits et surtout pour que les enfants gardent l’accès à leurs deux parents.
Même si l’introduction d’une coresponsabilité parentale semble acceptée ici ou là, nous devons exposer clairement de quoi il s’agit, car, parmi les organisations, des notions très différentes en sont retenues, et il y en a même qui préfèreraient garder le statu quo. Si leurs notions correspondent plus ou moins à une coparentalité, elles revêtent une forme qui n’apporte rien. Notre projet de loi va, au contraire, bien plus loin, car il ne demande pas seulement une autorité parentale conjointe, mais une coresponsabilité parentale. Cela signifie que ce n’est pas seulement le partage de l’autorité parentale qui est demandé, mais justement et surtout le partage équitable des devoirs éducatifs et de soins entre les deux parents.
Ce point de vue aurait l’avantage de décharger les mères, souvent surchargées, d’impliquer davantage la responsabilité des pères et, surtout, d’offrir à l’enfant une relation équilibrée à sa mère et à son père.

Détails des arguments pour ou contre

Et la suite ?

GeCoBi a démarré dans un grand élan, elle doit le garder. Durant le 2ème week-end d’août, plusieurs membres du comité se sont réunis et ont travaillé intensément le programme durant deux jours, afin que des premiers résultats tombent bientôt.

En octobre 2008, le Département de Justice va soumettre un projet de loi concernant l’autorité parentale conjointe. en consultation. Nous espérons évidemment que nos idées et propositions seront retenues. Nous avons retravaillé et complété nos arguments afin d’être mieux armés pour convaincre.
Le 13 septembre 2008, GeCoBi organise une journée de rencontre interne à Bienne. Les présidents des différentes organisations y sont invités, afin de cibler les buts à atteindre en 2009. Cette journée sera également l’occasion de mieux faire connaissance les uns avec les autres.
Vous le constatez, GeCoBi bouge !

Oliver Hunziker
Präsident GeCoBi

20.000 plaintes en Belgique concernant le droit de visite des enfants

Articles publiés sur
Le Soir
Chaque année, les parquets belges traitent quelque 20.000 plaintes concernant des violations du droit de visite, rapportent De Standaard et Het Nieuwsblad. Le parquet d’Anvers a récemment condamné une femme à une peine de prison ferme d’un an pour avoir empêché son ex-mari d’avoir des contacts avec leurs deux enfants durant quatre ans.
L’année dernière, les parquets ont traité 19.341 plaintes concernant la violation du droit de visite. En 2006, ce chiffre s’élevait à 19.800 et en 2005 à 22.219. Dans la majorité des cas, l’un des parents refuse de remettre l’enfant à son ex-compagnon.
« Systématiquement, l’enfant est la victime », explique la commissaire flamande aux droits de l’enfant Ankie Vandekerckhove. C’est pourquoi le Commissariat aux droits de l’enfant plaide pour l’intervention obligatoire d’un médiateur.
Luc Arron, président de l’association flamande Steunpunt Blijvend Ouderschap, estime que les instances judiciaires laissent trop souvent la situation dégénérer en raison de leur intervention trop laxiste. « Toutes les semaines, nous recevons des parents qui se battent depuis des années pour revoir leurs enfants », explique-t-il.
Chaque année en Belgique, 30.000 couples divorcent. Selon certaines estimations, 35.000 mineurs vivent chaque année le divorce de leurs parents."

7 sur 7
L'Echo

Le sujet est d’une très grande importance ! Mais il y a seulement 10 commentaires, alors qu’il devrait y en avoir des milliers!!!...
Au nom des 200.000 enfants privés de liens parentaux - après séparations/ divorces - merci de donner un peu de votre temps afin de réagir par vos commentaires, témoignages, vécus,… sur les articles en question.
Nous voyons tous, autour de nous, des enfants, des adolescents (et des adultes, les enfants d’hier) détruits après des séparations/divorces conflictuels… ayant vécu sans repères.
Ils sont tous en grande souffrance ! Certains, ou la plupart sont démotivés, perturbés, psychotiques, pervers, violents, toxicomanes, criminels,… ou se suicident.
Ne laissons pas l’imbécillité familialiste s’installer plus profondément dans les « Commerces des Robes Noires » ainsi que dans les mentalités indécentes !
Alors, réagissez et votez !
Cordialement vôtre,

Michel Willekens

Are the Family Laws fair and just?

All the governments of the UK claim family laws are fair and just. If the law is fair and just as the government states then why are there many thousand grandparents, fathers, mothers, children’s and other groups crying injustice. The governments refuse to give grandparents any rights of contact with their grandchildren.
We then thought, where does the real problem lie? If the Government says the law is fair yet the people using the law says it is not, then the problem must lie with how the law is used by its practitioners administering the law. We are told naively by the government that the professionals are 100% working for the best interests of the children. Our group ran a questionnaire sending out 500 to our members and the results that came back were clear that the professionals were less than perfect in practice. The professionals are human and albeit unwittingly using the best interest principle of the child to their own benefit always taking the easy or most profitable way out.
An investigation and monitoring of these services is urgently needed.

‘The Forgotten Children’
The children’s organisations Childline and (NSPCC) say they can only handle half of the distress calls they get from children which means a lot of children are not being heard. These organisations say they work in the best interests of the child but that cannot be true as they never actively promote grandparents as a source of help and safety. Grandparents are the very people who have a special relationship and have essential insight to the needs and faults of their family. The ‘Charter for Grandchildren’ was created by the Scottish Executive for organisations to look more closely at the role that grandparents can play in children’s lives but I doubt if the children’s agencies, courts, social services have even read it. So where are the ‘Best interests of the child’ when they do not promote grandparents as a valuable source of help to children.
Children 1st are more realistic in asking the Scottish government to give grandparents the right to information regarding their grandchildren’s welfare, yet grandparents are still refused the right of early intervention to help children in drug and alcohol homes where the carers refuse to allow contact of any kind.

A different stranger can be allowed to be with the children every night and the grandparents and fathers are devastated that they cannot be allowed access for the benefit of the children. If they did try they could be arrested and jailed. This enables drug addicts or alcoholics to carry on depriving or abusing children in secret. We call these kids ‘The Forgotten Children’ there are no moves by anyone to right this situation and the government continue to say “no contact for grandparents”.

The Family Unit
Non-resident parents are told they have rights to their children but in practice when they don’t live with the children they have none, only the resident parent has rights, the non-resident parent still retains their responsibilities but lose their rights and too often the children are used as weapons for revenge and blackmail. We must have a review of how this family law is administered.

Please write to your MP whichever country of the UK you live in and ask their help in righting this confused madness.

Join us or give a donation by sending a cheque via the address below to help us highlight the need for these changes. You will help the children you see on TV adverts that search in black bin bags for food. They are ‘The Forgotten Children’.

Thank you.
Ends

contact
Jimmy Deuchars
Grandparents Apart UK

"Daughters and Their Dads"
Dr Bruce Robinson's book
New release for Father's Day 7 September 2008
"It is never too late to work on the father-daughter relationship"

Movie Dads & Daughters - Father & Daughter
by Lastsafeplace

Dr Bruce Robinson's web site

To celebrate Father's Day Dr Bruce Robinson, author of best seller 'Fathering from the Fast Lane' (first released in 2001), is releasing a new book, 'Daughters and their Dads'.
Dr Robinson has been a great encouragement to our work at the Fatherhood Foundation over the years. He is one of the featured speakers in our Good to Great Fatherhood Mentoring course.
You will find my glowing review of Dr Robinson's new book on the back cover. 'This book is brilliant. It is the best book I have ever read on daughters and their dads without a shadow of a doubt. It is a must read book for every daughter and every dad'.

Dr Bruce Robinson sums up his book so well:
There is something particular in the relationship between daughters and their fathers that represents a powerful bond, a powerful potential influence, for good or bad. Sometimes dads tell me that all kids need one thing - love. I used to think that too. Just love them all and have good times with them and teach them stuff and everything would be OK. This is not so.
Dads need to be aware that there are several ways a daughter's future is peculiarly influenced by the relationship with her father. It is incorrect to say that girls only need the same inputs as boys - this is true to a point, but there are some things that are particularly important for girls. . .
. . . when I found this out I first became really concerned about my own performance as a father. Once I realised that as Amy's father my role was important and not optional, that I have a profound effect on her life for good or bad, I asked myself how well I was doing. Was I behaving in a way that will help her in her important relationships, not hinder them? And was I giving her confidence in herself rather than eroding that confidence? I had, up until then, thought I had been doing a pretty good job as a dad. But then I realised there were many things I just wasn't doing because I wasn't aware that my daughter needed anything different from what my sons needed.
The strategies listed in this book can strengthen the bond between a father and his daughter and help equip a daughter for life. What that means in reality won't be the same for every child, because every child is unique. And it won't be the same for every dad, because every dad is different. Also, not all dads reading this will be living in the same house as their children. Not every idea, tip and strategy will suit every reader so just take and use those that you find helpful. This is not an instruction manual but a collection of ideas that will suit different people at different times.

Call to action to assist ACFC's President, Dr. Linda Nielsen in her efforts to spread the Shared Parenting message

Her newest book: "Between Fathers and Daughters: Enriching or Rebuilding Your Adult Relationship" has just been released by publisher Cumberland House.

http://www.betweenfathersanddaughters.com/

Dr. Nielsen became ACFC President this past January. She has been a tireless campaigner for Shared Parenting for over twenty years.
In one of Dr. Nielsen's first efforts as ACFC President she produced a great brochure titled: "Shared Parenting: Facts & Fiction."
To date, we have reports of this pamphlet being distributed in the United States, Canada, Australia, Japan, Great Britain and Germany. Many people have written indicating they used citations from the pamphlet in their own cases as evidence of the need to maximize the time both parents spend with their children after divorce or in cases where the parents never married.
In an enewsletter earlier this year you'll recall how Dr. Nielsen provided legislative testimony on behalf of Shared Parenting in West Virginia and then further went on live radio to challenging misrepresentations of the judiciary committee chair.
Linda is a fighter, now it's time for us to show our support for her.....
Her newest book: "Between Fathers and Daughters: Enriching or Rebuilding Your Adult Relationship" has just been released by publisher Cumberland House.

We are asking our members and readers to purchase copies of the book through the ACFC bookstore. We have made an arrangement with the publisher providing that $7.00 of every copy sold through the ACFC bookstore will be used to fund a publicity campaign so Linda can further the Shared Parenting message.
click here to order
Your contributions will help Dr. Nielsen defray some of the expenses she will incur while attending the major national conferences for professional counselors. At these conferences she will be promoting shared parenting by sharing the research on the benefits of fathers' involvement and teaching counselors how to recognize their own biases against fathers in family therapy and in counseling related to custody decisions and parenting plans.
Dr. Nielsen will be targetting her message directly to court personnel, psychologists, college professors and custody evaluators highlighting the current research which supports maximizing father involvement in kids lives. At this time she plans to participate and/or present at the upcoming national conferences:
Association for Family and Conciliation Courts
American Association for Marriage and Family Therapy
American Counselors Association
Southeastern Psychological Association

"THE NOOS" the Lone Fathers Association Australia official newsletter

Leggi la newsletter - formato pdf

Unidos Por la Custodia Compartida

Madrid Event
5 October 2008

Barcellona Event
30 November 2008

Associations :

Amnistia Infantil

S.O.S. PAPA'

Plataforma por la
Custodia Compartida

Associacion por la Custodia Compartida
y la Igualdad de Castilla - La Mancha

Associacion por la Custodia Compartida y la Igualdad de Cuenca

ASOCIACIÓN CATALANA DE PADRES SEPARADOS (ACAPASE)

Plataforma Padres Sin Ley

Coparentalidad
ASOCIACIÓN MADRES/PADRES POR LA COPARENTALIDAD

Federación Andaluza de Madres y Padres Separados

¡ÚNETE YA!

Equal Parenting Bike Trek.
758 Miles from Lansing, MI to Washington, D.C on bycicles!
Departure Thursday 7 August 2008
at 12h00
from Capitol Building Lawn - downtown - Lansing, Michigan
[Internet web site]

Robb MacKenzie, Brian Downs,
Bill Foster e Bill Koellner

Dance4Equality will be present at the 2008 Equal Parenting Bike Trek Departure. A Child's Right has joined in a partnership/affiliation with Dance4Equality and founder Derek Bailey, MSW for equal parenting activities in Michigan. Dance4Equality will be dressed in their traditional American Indian regalia and will dance to their American Indian pow wow songs.Welcome them to the fight for equal parenting rights.
[Internet web site]

- 2nd Annual Family Preservation Festival - Lincoln Memorial in Washington, D.C.- 15-17/08/2008

[Internet web site]

I martedì di protesta dell'AFAMSE
44a Giornata di protesta
Martedì 15 luglio 2008

El robo de niños continúa aún en democracia
pero con otros actores:

Los dictadores de sentencias"

Los hijos robados a los familiares en la democracia post-dictadura son las víctimas vivas de un sistema legal infrahumano resabio de la otrora monarquía vetusta y envejecida que nos gobernó durante siglos, que caminan todos los días por las calles.
Los dictadores de sentencias y secuestradores legales se llevan lo más preciado que un ser humano puede aspirar como tal: Criar a su prole.
Sólo existe un único responsable: El Estado

“ Los niños del divorcio que pierden a su otra media familia ” -- Tal vez no sepas que cuando los padres se separan en no buenos términos, el sistema legal permite la monoparentalidad, esto es que los niños pierdan al otro 50% de sus familias. --

Tal vez no sepas que muchos de los progenitores que detentan la tenencia o guarda de los niños, realizan actos de violencia psicológica, movidos por odio, resentimiento, antipatías, para lograr su oscuro objetivo: que sus propios hijos odien para siempre a la otra parte de sus familias.

-- Conformando el llamado: Síndrome de Alienación Parental y consentido por los jueces abductores.

Ignoramos cuál es la idea-fuerza que te puede movilizar a realizar algún tipo de acción tendiente a evitar que esto continúe, te pedimos algo de solidaridad.

-- Es un mal que crece día a día y aspiramos a reducirlo. Muchos afirman no poder hacer gran cosa por encontrarse en sus trabajos y no poder acercarse.

-- Simplemente vamos a realizar Actos de protesta todos los martes (día de notas) en Lavalle 1220 frente a Tribunales llevaremos una figura o silueta realizada en madera fina de 90 cm de alto en representación de la falta -no deseada- de nuestros hijos abducidos por el Estado.

-- No esperamos una concurrencia masiva de familiares separados.

-- Históricamente a este tipo de convocatorias concurren muy pocas personas por razones laborales o cierto temor, por ello, si no podes venir o todavía te sentís amedrentado, acércanos la figura o silueta en madera fina de 90 cm de alto representando a tus hijos/nietos/sobrinos y súmala a las otras.

--TODOS LOS MARTES-- en Lavalle 1220 frente a Tribunales -Cámara Nacional de Apelaciones en lo Civil-

Héctor Alejandro Baima PRESIDENTE
Marcela di Pascuo SECRETARIA
AFAMSE

[Foto e video di tutti i martedì di protesta]